~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Claire, what are you thinking about? a million different things. I don't know what to think half the time. the other half is what I've always known to be so. So many things happen at once. Does life ever slow down? no Claire, it doesn't. it gets busier and even more confusing. but what would the fun in it be if you knew it all? maybe, just maybe, I could concentrate on the things I should. like school for example. I don't know what's going on or where I'll be next year, and to tell you the truth I'm not particularly worried; I feel very little for that right now. I'm sick of thinking and talking about that. I just want to be done with it. Claire, this is part of life. it gets confusing! and I hate to tell ya this, but you need to think and talk about it. it's a big deal. it affects your future greatly. but this, you already know. but you seem to have forgotten this. Not only that, but you might never get opportunities again like you have now! deal with it, think about it, pray about it, and work your tail off. but I'm tired. oh grow up. that's an excuse a 4-year old would use. well I still don't know what to do. confused? I know you are. That's why our Creator let's us talk with Him. He'll help you if you let Him. I know. I know He hears me. But sometimes what He tells me to do just doesn't seem logical. or correct-like He misunderstood me or something. He knows what's best for you; don't you ever doubt that! Claire, His hands are far more capable of holding onto your life, keeping it organized, and prosperous and happy than your hands. you are weak on your own. you can't do it, and you NEED Him. trust Him, He'll never let you down. I know. all of this- I know. I know. I know. I know. but you fogot. I know. You didn't listen. I know. You were doubtful. I know. You are making excuses-lame ones at that. I know. You have no need to be scared of what lies ahead of you. I know. He's there. I know. He's good. I know. but you are scared anyway. I know. you are confused. I know. do you trust Him completely? you need to. I know. You forgot how big He is. I know. why? I have no clue. then cut it out. grow up and deal with it. you're a big girl. it's ok to ask for help when you need it. and when you don't need it. but I don't know how. I don't know where to start. did you ask? no. why? I don't know. see? you don't know everything-you can't do it alone. on your own you are nothing. but with God-you're invincable. it's time to stop making excuses. don't forget. don't forget any of this. I won't. well, you probably will, but hopefully next time, it won't take as long to figure it out. Lord, forgive my laziness and stubbornness. You are much stronger than I. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ | 
